I'm going to be the best father EVOR

I knew all those hours of playing RPGs (role playing games for the uninitiated) would amount to something. If only a baby came with a +7 tome of sleep, then parents would be set.

The irony is I don't want my kids (if I am to have any) to play video games so dungeons and dragons will have to do. Maybe I'll have to think about this one further.

It's strange to see gamers growing up and becoming adults, because as a kid I felt adults would never "get" the video game craze. I was right until we all grew up and became adults ourselves. Now we are still gamers but we don't want the same content. This is where Nintendo has gone wrong but that's a thought for another time.

Hypocrite Warning

I have a couple of questions for you:

Why do people watch movies like "Pearl Harbor"?

How is it that a Childrens' book such as the Harry Potter series have such widespread appeal?

And finally, how does a self professed music connoisseur, such as myself become enamored with such an asinine song like "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas?

A recent study by Columbia University researchers may have discovered the tip of the answers iceberg by looking at the listening habits of 14,341 participants drawn from a teen-interest Web site. The conclusions of the study show that we make our music purchases based partly on our perceived preferences of others.

I don't want to hear anything about the diversity (or lack there of) of the sample groups. Most likely they were impressionable youngsters who just wanted to fit in. Well I think we all can guess what marketers consider their most important demographic.

In an increasingly complex world (with more choices than you can shake a stick at) we might be relying too heavily on the influence of others in our choices. I have another question: What else is new? Advertising is a business predicated on this very same social condition, and it seems to be working out just fine for them.

Good news for marketers. Bad news for the possible emergence of anything of substance in the face of huge budgets. At least I know my mind hasn't been invaded. Now excuse me. I have to go listen to "My Hump", on my Apple I-pod, while reading the newest edition of Harry Potter. "Pearl Harbor", however, is where I draw the line.

Madden Odds

This comes from Darren Rovell's Sports Business Blog on ESPN.com. Seriously, it's not as boring as it sounds. I promise. Maybe I should have hedged my bets by putting some money down on something like this:

Madden Odds

The people at Pinnacle Sports apparently know what they are talking about. On the second play of Seattle's second drive, ABC announcer John Madden said this: "Kimo Von Oelhoffen has a heck of a club." Why did the people at the sports gambling outfit care? Because they predicted that, out of a list of Maddenisms, he would use that one first. Here were the odds on a proposition bet Pinnacle put out before the game that asked fans to wager on what Madden would say first after kickoff: "Heck of a" (6/5), "Big time," (7/2), "Horsecollar" (7/1), "Boom!" (7/1), "Manhandled" (9/1), "Wham!" (15/1). PinnacleSports.com reported that about 150 people won $6 for every $5 they bet by predicting that "Heck of a" would come first. John Madden did not place a bet himself.

Super Bowl My Ass (or how I learned to stop caring and love the whine)

As you might or might not know, I am a Seahawks fan. It's been rough and I'm sorry to admit that over the years my interest in the team has waned because of their constant letdowns and overall mediocrity... This is what you sign up for as a Seahawk fan (or any fan in general unless you are very lucky), and it is a well known rule that to give up on your team or to not put everything you have behind them in every situation is equivalent to sin. I consider this post to be a sort of confessional for me to vent just a little and show where my allegiances lie. Now on with the show:

This was the first time since '96 that I have been able to enjoy one of my teams in a Championship Game (in '96 the Supes lost to Michael Jordan and the Bulls who were beginning their second Threepeat), and I was more than moderately excited. I wasn't concerned that the Steelers were 4 point favorites heading in or that approximately 256,365 Steeler fans showed up compared to Seattle's 7.

As the game wore on I could tell this team was not only beatable but likely to be beaten even with the missed chances the Seahawks were amassing through an assortment of drive killing penalties and dropped passes. We were holding up the Steeler's blitzburg packages that had been talked about all week with relative ease and this was the brightest sign of the night.

When Seattle took the field for their final drive of the first half I started to have my doubts especially when D-jack's TD was called out of bounds (much more on this later). We ended up with nothing, missing a 50 yard field goal as time expired. No worries right. I certainly wasn't worried at that point. Maybe I should have...

I'm not going to talk about the officiating too much because it's already been dissected by everyone in the "real" media (that's right, I am a self-proclaimed member of the "fake" media). One drive that stands out was in the fourth quarter right before Hasselbeck's costly INT during which there was a Horse collar tackle not called, a phantom holding penalty, and a block below the waist called on Hasselbeck while he was making a tackle. Seriously... how can you call it a block when the player is on D? It seems a little counterproductive to be blocking someone on D.

Here is a list of partisan grippers that I feel adequately put the debacle into perspective:

1) Micheal Smith - "Here's what referee Bill Leavy's crew did, point blank: It robbed Seattle."

2) Skip Bayless (who had been killing us in the media for weeks on end for being undeserving) - "On this night, the Steelers had their own version of [the Seahawk's] 12th Man. He wore a striped shirt and a whistle. He threw a flag."

3) Gene Wojciechowski (just so I can say I'm presenting both sides of the argument) - "Enough already with the whining. The Seahawks had their chances. Plenty of them to overcome the Steelers and, if they insist, the refs, too."

OK I lied... More gripping about the refs along with indisputable video evidence showing Seattle got jobbed (at least for one touchdown). Did I mention I had a three-way $100 bet on this game? FUCK!



How is this not a Touchdown? It's a documented rule that if you touch the pylon while still in-bounds it's a touchdown. D. Jackson caught the ball, his left foot hits in-bounds then his right foot hits the pylon - TD right?!?! In the rulebooks yes but not at this Superbowl.

"A player no longer can be ruled out of bounds when he touches a pylon unless he already touched the boundary line." Straight from the NFL site, ruled changes made in March of 2002!

In fact John Clayton wrote about this exact rule change on ESPN as well: "A player will be ruled in bounds if he touches the pylon at the goal line before going out of bounds. For example, a pass would be considered complete if one foot touches the pylon and the other foot is in bounds". Which happened exactly as the rule is written to the letter. Unreal.

But since it was inside 2 min mark Sea couldn't challenge it (why is that anyway?), and the replay official didn't even stop play to review it. AND Pit called a timeout to stop the clock. Which gave them plenty of time to call for a review. WTF?

And the NFL has the audacity to support the officiating by saying it was 'properly officiated'. The ESPN poll asking readers whether or not they agreed with the NFL on this issue shows that (at the time of this post's publishing) out of 32,778 people polled 78.4% disagreed with this assessment. Of course I did vote about 24,834 times so maybe I skewed the data a bit. Now you must please excuse me while I go rip my eyeballs from my skull with my bare hands...

Enough about officiating. Moving on to the walrus...

What was Holmgren thinking, down by 11 at the 50 yard line, punting on 4th and about 12 with 6:30 to go in the game? Doesn’t he know that the only thing Pittsburgh has been able to do all season is run the clock out? Predictably the punt sails deep into the end zone for a touchback.

In conclusion I don't blame the refs, even though I should. The game was very winnable, but in-game coaching blunders (especially at the end of the halves) doomed the Seahawks when they still had at least a chance to come back. However, you can be damn sure I'm going to be bitter about this game for a long time.

Thailand

So I have a couple of pictures of Thailand I would like to share (I've been there for the last 11 days or so and it's the reason I haven't been blogging. I know what you are thinking... "There are plenty of Internet Cafes there, why didn't you just blog from there." Well I'd rather spend my time in the sun and stuff so there.)

Ben in the back of truck on the way to KaiBei Beach. The roads were wicked curvy but we would go out and rent motorbikes all the same. Heck for five dollars a day it was the best entertainment we could find... That is until it got dark. We would have a bi-nightly cocktail hour with this fruity Thai rum and fresh pineapple juice... Good Stuff

Me trying to look cool on our first night on Ko Chang. Not a cocktail night as we hadn't discovered the wonderful nectar but a good night all the same. We drank many Chang beers and when we were feeling a little saucy we would have ourselves some Singhas. That first night we put down a whole lot of food. Later this night we ran into...

Our Beach Soccer Friends, we sang songs and were first introduced to the sweet rum of the islands. From then on we were hooked even though they liked to drink it with water, which was not quite as good as the pineapple juice. My feet were beat to hell after the beach soccer game, because we played at low tide on the compacted sea bed.

Beach Breakfast - a favorite morning hangout on KaiBei Beach: beautiful views and all the fresh fruit you could eat. The Islands in the distance are about 45 minutes of hard kayaking away and we made the trip one day. They looked much closer than they seemed so by the time we left it was dark and we made our way back over the dark and silent sea.

My Badass Bungalow on White Sands Beach: I loved this thing. It had a window that opened up to the sun rise and I would get up super early (almost) everyday to eat breakfast and get some early sun. I'd take a break at mid-day and go to an internet cafe, so as not to take in the rough sun, then go back for more (I know you can't tell from looking at me)

Angry Bryan at White Sands: I don't know what he was angry about... maybe the fish weren't biting that day or something. Anyways, those are some cool glassed huh? Can you tell I'm just typing stuff so that I can put all the text relating to this picture right next to it? You see I haven't figured out all the functions so that's what I do.

Our Swedish Friends who we met on White Sands Beach. They were very impressed that I could sing the "one elephant went out to play, upon a spider's web one day" song in Swedish. If not for my Swedish friends from ASIJ this would not be possible. Big Ups to my long time bro Fred Kumlin or making this communication a reality!

So that's my vacation in a nutshell. Overall it was very sandy and filled with adventure and danger. In conclusion I must say that it's a good idea to wear shoes when motorbiking, not getting too wasted and don't wrestle on the beach unless you feel like having sand in every crevase for the next 3 weeks. If you have questions please do ask.

google.cn

Google the world powerhouse of search engines has decided today to bow down to the powers that be in China so as to have more access to their more than 111 million internet users. Whether this is a good business decision or a cop out is irrelevant (for me at least) considering you can access the America version of google here as easily as it is to make fun of Paris Hilton (Something I have surprisingly stayed away from in this space so maybe this isn't a good metaphor...).

Google agreed to omit Web content that the country's government finds objectionable, and Google will base its censorship decisions on guidance provided by Chinese government officials. Even the most idealistic person can see that there was really no other choice if the company was going to continue it's battle with yahoo. Maybe Sergey Brin and Larry Page need to change their corporate policy from "Don't Be Evil" to, "to make an omlette you need to break a few eggs."

It's entirely possible that somewhere down the road, China will lift it's restrictions on the complete dissemination of information, but by then, if Google hadn't had made a move there would have been no move to make. That being said, I don't applaud Google for it's actions, but I can't really blame them either. It also needs to be mentioned that Google denied US authorities in their attempts to subpoena the searches of millions of Americans just last week, one of only 4 companies to do so. You must say that where they have the ability to make a difference they try to do so.

The Fact that they are not offering the gmail or blog applications in China show a foresight that may have prevented a major PR blunder if Google was eventually asked to give up information from individual users. Both Yahoo and Microsoft were either forced to give up information or shutdown sites the government was opposed to. If gone unappeased China would most likely boot whoever was not giving them what they want out of the country.

In the end China is only doing what the Bush white house would be doing if they had the power which doesn't exactly instill confidence in my already shaky opinion of 'Dubya'. This can be seen in Bush's secret wire tapping of phones that he didn't have the right to tap as well as the aforementioned subpoenaing of search results. Maybe we, as Americans should be looking closer to home before nailing China to a cross for their censorship laws. China is far from perfect but America is sneaking up on them faster than we think.

The Imaculate Detention

Here is something that will shock and amaze. Well not too much considering he was an evil Steelers fan. Hopefully this will put karma on the Seahawks' side.

Cut Me! (a break)

You have to love this even if you aren't a fan of the movies. They aren't calling it Rocky VI most likely because the producers don't want to acknowledge Rocky V ever happened, so the movie is going to be called Rocky Balboa: Return From Irrelevance. Don't forget to check out the Rocky Balboa Blog. And in other Sylvester Stallone movie news you are going to have to see this to believe it. Yes, Rambo IV is in production, but one has to wonder why it isn't being called First Blood IV?. When Stallone originally conceived the idea around 2002, the plot involved Rambo going into Afghanistan to battle terrorists. Brilliant!

Just For The Hell Of It: Scarlett Johansson

Kobe's Sick Night

OK here is John Hollinger's great article on Kobe's downright sick night on Sunday:

It seems at first glance that Wilt Chamberlain's 100-point night in 1962 is far superior to Kobe Bryant's 81-point game Sunday. After all, Bryant still needed 19 more points -- roughly Pau Gasol's average -- just to catch the Dipper.

But if you stack the two games side by side, you'll come to the startling realization that Bryant's performance was actually far superior. Breaking the two games down by the numbers, it quickly becomes apparent what a dominant night Kobe had. Consider the facts:

Wilt scored 100 of his team's 169 points in the 1962 game.
Bryant was more efficient. Bryant needed 46 shot attempts and 20 free throws to get 81 points. Chamberlain needed 63 field-goal attempts and 32 free-throw tries to get his 100. Bryant's true shooting percentage for the night was 73.9 percent; Chamberlain's was only 63.9 percent.

Bryant's performance was more real. In Chamberlain's game, the Warriors intentionally fouled the Knicks in the final minute of play to get the ball back for another Chamberlain try at the century mark. Only on his third try did he get to 100. At the time, his team was comfortably ahead, as it was for the entire second half, and it won 169-147. Bryant, on the other hand, got almost all his points when they were desperately needed, as his team trailed by 18 early in the third quarter.

Bryant needed fewer minutes. If you want to really be amazed, consider the fact that Kobe sat out for six minutes in the second quarter. So Bryant scored his 81 points in only 42 minutes, while Wilt played the full 48 in his 100-point effort. Had he played for an additional six minutes and scored at the same rate (hardly an unreasonable assumption, given how much gas he appeared to have at the end), Kobe would have finished with 93 points. Yes, 93.

The game was different. Of all the differences between Bryant's game and Chamberlain's, this one is perhaps the biggest. Chamberlain's game ended up 169-147, Bryant's 122-104. Obviously, there was a huge difference in the speed of play, and that meant Chamberlain had far more opportunities to score than Bryant did.

Chamberlain's game featured 233 field-goal attempts versus 164 for Bryant's, and 93 free-throw attempts to 60 for Bryant's. We have no data on turnovers and offensive rebounds for Chamberlain's game, but based on the numbers I just mentioned, we can estimate there were 46 percent more possessions in the Chamberlain game than in the Kobe game.

If that's the case, we need to inflate Kobe's numbers by 46 percent to get an accurate idea of what it equates to in Chamberlain's era. The answer? An unbelievable 118 points. And if we add in six extra minutes for Bryant, we end up with the mind-boggling total of 135. By one player. In one game.

Another way to look at it is by deflating Chamberlain's numbers by a similar amount. If we change his currency into "2006 points," so to speak, the Stilt ends up with 68 points -- still an awesome performance, but clearly not on a level with Kobe's 81-point outburst. And once you adjust for the 48 minutes Chamberlain played vs. Kobe's 42, you end up with 60 points for Wilt -- or just a bit more than Kobe rang up in the second half.

So when our Marc Stein says this is the most amazing performance ever, believe it. Once you adjust for the differences in pace between the two eras and the fact that Bryant sat out for six minutes, even Chamberlain's monumental 100-point game pales by comparison. For basketball historians, Bryant's effort is now the scoring effort against which all others should be measured.

Young Chuck Norris

From the people who brought you "Lazy Sunday," comes.... "Young Chuck Norris". Hopefully this means that SNL is checking the blogosphere and listening to what everyone is saying. It would certainly be a good thing if they could lift themselves out of the doldrums of mediocrity, and listening to the people who watch their show is a good first step.

Johjima, Seahawks, etc...

You've heard so much about him! Women want him and men want to be him! Now he's coming to America for the first time, humble and just looking to do whatever he can for the team!

Seriously though, I like the additions the mariners are making this year (not to mention some of the subtractions; Ryan Franklin ring any bells). Johjima and Washburn are two guys that won't knock your socks off but are perfectly capable of putting up good numbers at Safeco.

Throw in the maturation of one of the most heralded pitching prospects in recent memory (i.e. Felix Hernandez), the continued production of Sexson from the four spot and the possible uncrappification of Adrian Beltre and you are looking at a team that could improve mightily from their disappointing season last year.

I'm looking at a team right now that if they catch some breaks, could get above the .500 mark quite easily. However, the American League West is always pretty tough so we can't count on it.

News and Notes: The Seahawks are heading to their first Superbowl ever and all I am talking about is our new catcher who might or might not be any good. I have issues. Maybe it's just that I don't want to put myself out there so that I can get burned once again. I will try to get my take on the up coming Superbowl down in this space sometime before the game but I can't promise anything considering I'm taking off for Thailand at the end of the week. They do have internet cafes there in abundance but where do you think I would rather be? In a stuffy room looking at a screen or on the beach sipping a drink with a little umbrella in it? That's what I thought.

Silent Hill - The Movie

Me and Graham Nelson (one of the Holy Trinity and friend to all) used to play this game and we would shit our pants with FEAR! FEAR! FEAR! And the thing is, as good as this was as a video game, it always looked like it would make a better movie than a game. We can only hope that they a do a good job with it, but judging by the Trailer it looks like it could be very creepy. Plus Sean Bean (Boromir from Lord Of The Rings) is in it and this looks like a good vehicle for him to show his leading man chops. Hopefully it's better than Viggo Mortensen's post LOTRs flop Hidalgo.

Really Simple Syndication

I know that all my super internet literate friends who read this know what an RSS is but here's some information on them. I like the words of warning at the end, telling people not to get trapped in their own little bubble, and I honestly don't know what is so hard about using bookmarks but if it's the wave of the future and more people are going to be doing it then it's important to everyone.

From the, "that's very interesting and almost scary because it makes sense in a conspiracy type of way but I'm not actually saying that..." Department

Most of the world's supply of [Shikimic acid] comes from the seed of the star anise, the fruit of a tree grown in China. As demand for Tamiflu has soared, the price of shikimic acid from that source has spiked from $45 a kilogram to over $600 in the last year. There are also persistent fears the Chinese government will ban export of the element in order to secure its own supplies.

Shikimic acid is used to make the synthetic element oseltamivir, marketed by global pharmaceutical megafirm Roche Laboratories Inc. as Tamiflu.

Here's a link to the full article.

So the trouble started in China, and most of the world's supply of the only thing that really can stop the bird flu is in China... Forget I said anything.

News Flash: Microsoft Trying To Take Over The World

Imagine you're watching a show in which you can click on any product therein and it takes you directly to the product's website where you can purchase said product. This isn't exactly a new idea. We've all been hearing about it for years but it looks like Microsoft is looking to make this a reality. Here's the link to the article in the Seattle Post-Intellegencer

Conan O'Brien Rules Finnish Politics

You be the Judge. Seperated at birth?

It's Official: I'm a Bill Simmons Wannabe...

I first noticed it when I started to quote His Playoff Gambling Manfesto. Then came the unending viewings of "The Karate Kid". Now I've taken the next step: Welcome to my Running Diary of the Patriot-Broncos playoff game on 01/14/06. Once again I will preface this post with the statment, "it is crap." Now on with the Diary (which by the way even though it's posted a little late I my thought processes hasn't changed and this is all what was originally written down in my notebook):

9:14 - Holy Shit, there's the alarm.

9:16 - Just put on my patriots 2001 AFC Champions t-shirt. Since I have owned this shirt they have won 3 of 4 Superbowls and have not lost a playoff game. Think it will be enough to beat the broncos by 4? (I told you didn't I? I'm turning into Simmons with all his superstition. Next thing you know I'll be talking about how "The Shawshank Redemption" is one of the greatest movies ever made... OK probably not).

9:20 - Called my buddies to see if they are coming over as promised. No answer. I'm sure a-dawg (yes giving my friends stupid nicknames. Another Simmons calling card) is afraid considering he already lost money to me by betting Denver would gain 250 rushing yards against Oakland earlier in the year. I took that bet pretty quickly and they barely topped 100. Here's something that should be on everyone's gambling manifesto: Don't bet while shit-faced!

9:36 - Patriots marching. Looks like they have this Denver D on the ropes but John Lynch is looking like a monster on the blitz and is disrupting everything. 3 hurries in the first 2 New England drives, with the last one disrupting Brady on a 4th and 1 leading to the turnover on downs.

9:41 - My mom just walked in. ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!?!?

9:55 - Announcer: "And the Broncos have their deepest penetration of the night" (insert own joke here... pun intended) I'm so mature.

10:18 - Asante Samuel is having the game of his life. His INT keeps the Broncos out of the points again. The Broncos look like the stronger team but the Patriots are playing their game (bending but not breaking) and it is at this point when the Patriots usually turn the tide and start making backbreaking plays...

10:19 - I swear to god. 51 yard pass by Brady over the middle.

10:23 - Broncos are putting a lot of pressure on Brady and they seem to be stuffing up drives right when the patriots start getting on a roll. Brady's ability to handle the rush is what makes him great though (It's not a man crush, I promise... but the guy does have 3 superbowl rings...)

10:27 - Vinateri is an animal in the playoffs. Pats up 3-0.

10:31 - Quick 3 and out for Denver followed by Todd Sauerbrun coming in for the punt. At this point I'm thinking, "Isn't that the same guy who was taking steroids prescribed by his doctor when he was with the Carolina Panthers --> Answer is Yes.

10:35 - Faulk fumbles and Carolina scores and Da Crew enters.

10:50 - OK it's halftime and I need time to digest the turn of events... The Patriots just had two fumbles within 18 seconds of each other, both after the 2 minutes warning and in their own territory. I think I see the four horsemen of the apocalypse riding onto the field but then I clean my glasses and realize... the broncos just converted the turnovers into 10 points while gaining a total of 8 yards (not to mention a defensive pass interference call on Asante Samuel for 39 yards, who by the way is having the worst game of his career (and in an amazing show of writing ability I am going to use the double parenthesis and say that, that call was not only horribly wrong but inexcusably late)). The icing on the cake is the fact that the second fumble was caused by the immortal Todd Sauerbrun (guess "the program" really helped him out) At this point I'm beginning to wonder if this isn't the Pats night...

11:21 - As the teams battle for field position I can't help but think about how much the Broncos are disrespecting the TWO TIME DEFENDING WORLD CHAMPIONS. I mean how dare they take the lead in a playoff game against any team that Tom Brady is quarterback for? And how dare they disrespect the Pats offense so that they only score 3 points in a half. It's absolutely ridiculous!

11:34 - Two words for you: Champ Bailey. Too bad he was a bitch and slowed down before getting the touchdown. Ben Watson came from virtually the total opposite corner and knocked the ball away at the one yard line. I had visions of Leon Lett and Don Beebe dancing in my head after this play. Too bad Watson couldn't force the touchback like Beebe did because Mike Anderson walks it in on the next play after a long timeout for the New England challenge. Count with me now: 9 yards gained on broncos scoring drives for 17 points!!!

11:46 - The Pats are dinking and dunking down the field, really playing how they want to be playing but as usual in this game their drive is stalled. What are you going to do? Take the 43 yard field goal right? Automatic right? Vinetieri missed it wide right. Hmmm.

11:57 - Willie McGinest just shoved a teammate on the sideline.... I've never seen these Patriots play a game like this.

12:03 - A-Dawg just asked a good question: "How many fights do you think Ashley Lelie got into as a kid with a name like that?" Now that I've had time to form an adequate comeback: "depends on when he had his growth spurt." OH SNAP!

12:04 - Vince Wilford just tried to get into it with one of the Broncos players after a false start on an extra point attempt. Do I even have to say anything? Oh yeah Broncos 24 Patriots 6.

Nothing else really to say about this... Denver added another field goal. Brady threw another interception. Pats ended up turning the ball over 5 times and most of them were on their own side of the field. 8 penalties for 82 yards isn't horrible but it's just not a recipe for success on the road. You know what though? As lucky and blessed as the Patriots have been the last 5 years, I wouldn't doubt that the Superbowl is going to be bombed or something and going to the Superbowl would have actually been a bad idea. I guess we'll never know (the whole butterfly flaps its wings in Beijing thing). OK maybe that's not the best thing to be writing on the internet. If I don't post in a while I'm probably in prison. They better have a TV there that shows my Seahawks winning the Superbowl.

You would worship him as a god too if he got you 3 super bowl titles in 4 years. Can't wait for the games tomorrow. Being in China I can't get the games at a decent hour. 9:30 tomorrow morning is as decent as it gets. My picks are Seattle, Indy, Chicago, New England, all against the spread. I love this game.

I often feel that I can't express myself clearly. Part of the reason that I started this Blog was to (besides becoming rich and famous) develop my external voice. I work enough on the internal one so I don't need any help with that thank you very much. I often wonder why I am the way that I am, as do I'm sure everyone. I think I've reached a good point in my quest for clarity. I'm no longer ashamed of people reading what I have to say in this space. Maybe it's true that blogging is a form of therapy. I do feel better already...

Federation for the Debunking of PCness

Here is a cool link that sources Malcolm Gladwell to the comparisons being made between Larry Bird and Adam Morrison. In today's "PC" society it's almost impossible to say anything anymore without worrying about the racial implications and I think this article helps to break down some of these ridiculous barriers in both a scientific and logical way. I'm going to have to pick up a Chuck Klosterman book sometime. <--(mental note in blog form)

I Feel Smart

Linking to things like this make me feel smart and it's also pertinent to the where I am right now. Thank goodness I get paid In RMB and my student loans are in US dollars. It's all Bush's fucking fault anyways! If not for the war in Iraq and it's projected 2 Trillion dollar price tag, this might not be happening... Of course I can't kid myself. We were on the way down before the war... BUT NOT BEFORE BUSH!!!! Does anyone wonder why I felt like leaving the country?

What Was He Thinking?!?!

The Following is from Darren Rovel's Sports business blog on ESPN.com.

On Monday, Cleveland Cavaliers guard Damon Jones was scheduled to hold a news conference in the ballroom of the Ritz Carlton Hotel to announce that he's the first NBA player to endorse Chinese shoe brand Li-Ning. There is supposedly going to be an advertising campaign in China featuring Jones, though I'm not sure the Chinese are as familiar with Jones as they are with his teammate LeBron James. "I'm an icon. I'm global," Jones told the Cleveland Plain Dealer. "If I was on the All-Star ballot, I'd have a million votes in China. And none here, because everybody thinks I'm arrogant." You've also only started three of 31 games this year and you're shooting 5-for-32 (15.6 percent) in your last seven games played.

Idiots At Large

Sorry I skipped December. I was hibernating with my supply of sweet, sweet honey. Just wanted ya'll to check out this interesting article. It shows how out of touch the masses are (not going to say Midwestern Americans because I know them and love them on a non-macro level), and how afraid they are of the scare of the day. I know anyone who has seen "Bowling for Columbine" will think I'm just spouting recycled left-wing rhetoric, but hear me out. Just because annoying people who think they know what they are talking about because they have seen one movie that says people are just frightened into submission, doesn't mean it's not true. With that I give you Idiots at Large:


Sauerkraut sales soar after bird flu report
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
By CAROLINA BOLADO
HERALD NEWS

After scientists at Seoul National University in South Korea discovered that one type of fermented cabbage helped cure infected chickens of the avian flu, Americans flocked to grocery stores and picked up this country's favorite version of fermented cabbage: sauerkraut.

According to Chris Smith, vice president of marketing for Frank's Sauerkraut, sales have skyrocketed for several weeks, spiking as high as 850 percent at one Midwestern store. Sales in the Twin Cities area were up, on average, 77 percent.

"We saw movement up a little bit, and we were curious to see what was causing it," Smith said.

The company attributed the sharp increase to a report on a local television station in Minneapolis about the South Korean researcher Professor Kang Sa-ouk, whose team found that an extract of kimchi – a popular Korean pickle made of fermented cabbage with radishes, garlic, ginger and peppers – helped infected chickens recover from the flu. Scientists are experimenting on the theory that the culture fluid produced during the fermentation process has antibacterial qualities. Sauerkraut, which is sliced cabbage fermented with salt for at least a month, produces the same fluid.

"We're just amazed at the reaction of people when they hear about the Korean study," Smith said. "They're scared of this pandemic, so they're looking for anything to potentially protect themselves."

It is called the mariner...

The Seattle Mariners have just signed a Catcher from the Japan leagues and it has people all up in a huff. Will he be able to communicate with teammates and run the team effectively?

Now correct me if I'm wrong but isn't the most communicative player on the field usually the catcher? Doesn't he have to develop a rapport with pitchers that can only be achieved by being able to talk with them on more than a basic level.

Wrong, Wrong, Wrong!

Can someone please tell me where the Chiba Lotte Marines play. Can someone also tell who coaches them. Can someone tell me if that person can speak Japanese... Point is Bobby Valentine has been managing in Japan and won a championship there recently. He is not fluent in Japanese. See what I'm saying here? Besides, I hear this new catcher's English isn't horrible... unlike this post.

Fight Club

My favorite scene from that movie (OK I would say this about any scene from this movie) is when Ed Norton is fading in and out of consciousness as Tyler Durden tell him about the world he envisions:

"In the world I see - you are stalking elk through the damp canyon forests around the ruins of Rockefeller Center. You'll wear leather clothes that will last you the rest of your life. You'll climb the wrist-thick kudzu vines that wrap the Sears Tower. And when you look down, you'll see tiny figures pounding corn, laying strips of venison on the empty car pool lane of some abandoned superhighway."

Every time I hear this line, I can't help but wonder if this world would be a better place.
away from all the bullshit of everyday life.

Comforts forgotten on the swirling winds of some winter, unhindered by central heating
the keeping of the beating of ones heart,
the only art that keeps the attention of men and women, is that of the aforementioned
don't forget where you came from...

Big Ups

Congrats to me and my school, University of Oregon for finishing 10-1 with a 56-14 buttwhupin' of our in state rivals the Beavs. Our only loss is to #1 USC and we've played through losing our starting quarterback, Kellen Clemens, for the season. We havn't won 10 games since we finished 11-1 and ranked #2 in the nation in 2001. We were led by Joey Harrington, the clutch quarterback, who decided not to play in the NFL so as not to sully his legacy (I wish).

Here's their ESPN website: http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/clubhouse?teamId=2483

Question of the Day

Are these NBA Hall of Fame numbers?

16 years
Games: 1134
Games Started: 979
Minutes: 33,838
FGM-FGA: 5,205-10,510
3PA-3PM: 100-426
FTM-FTA: 2,888-4,176
OFF REB: 2,881
DEF REB: 6,445
TOT REB: 9,326
AST: 3,541
STL: 1,288
BLK: 1,631
TO: 2,470
PF: 3,609
PTS: 13,398

Golblet of Crap...

I was just trying to get a rise out of you... So I just got back from the new Harry Potter and I have to say it was OK. I've never been to a theater in China so that was a new experience. I just felt like I needed to see a good copy of the movie to evaluate it properly. The sound quality is horrible in the theaters here so they try to make up for it by putting the volume up to "ear bleeding" levels. And it cost 70 RMB, which is about 9 dollars. Surprising considering most things in China are cheaper than their American counterpart. I was feeling truly American after having lunch at McDonald's so I didn't mind much.... besides, it's Harry Potter for god's sake!

So the movie is alright until I realize that I'm 23 and alone in a theater full of Kids and their parents. I spend the rest of the movie thinking about what this means. A couple of quick thoughts on the movie that I had between pondering my life:

1) Love Voldemort. Fiennes was and is going to be good in this role. I want to know if they pushed his nose down using makeup or they just used CGI.

2) Not enough time to cover everything. Minor characters are given the backseat to harry and his crew which is good and bad. Good in that it's the only way the movie stays 2 hours 20 min or so, but bad in that what's great about the books is the many characters and the virtual world that Rowlands weaves.

3) What's with moaning mertle hitting on potter when he's taking a bath? That was a little disturbing... pretty soon they are just going to go all out with sex scenes and an NC-17 rating. Mark my words.

4) Why doesn't harry just conjure up his broom for the third task like he did in the first. I mean he did have his wand didn't he... and he was allowed to use it...

5) since when was "Bloody Hell" considered not a curse and something Children should be subjected to numerous times? Think about it... and then think about what this world is coming too. And no I'm not 80 years old.

6) I say we need a new Harry Potter. Daniel Radcliffe has lost his edge. (I'm just saying this to incite discussion amongst my readers... yes readers)

7) is anyone else excited for the day the 7th movie comes out on DVD so as to facilitate the worlds most magical marathon ever? If you didn't already know, I am a major dork.

8) I also can't wait for the scene in the near future when the entire Griffindor House has an intervention for Neville Longbottom to confront him about his weight loss, punctuated by Hermine's line "Bloody hell! you need to lay off the Blow you git!"

9) Why is Harry continually amazed by magic? At the beginning of the movie he walks into a smallish sized tent and the inside is huge. It's takes him a couple minutes to get over this and all he can utter is "I love Magic." Get over it Harry. You've been a wizard in training for too long to let your jaw hang agap over magic.

I give the movie props for moving in a darker direction but it was something that was called for so not too many props (should I say "much" here... is props plural or not? Maybe if I was black I would know this...). The movies have become a little to cookie-cutter to me if you know what I mean. Maybe a little too fast paced but all and all I think they did a good job on it. Will be looking forward to the next one because I really can't stop now. Everybody is doing it, is another one of my excuses. The End.

NBA All Interview Team

KEVIIIIN! GAAARNETT!

Seriously though. This Award actually exists.

This is the worst fucking blog site I've ever seen. I can't even link things. If this is not true then please, someone, show me the light. I just want to prove the NBA All-Interview team actually exists without making it too hard on my readers (of which there are none). Is that too much to ask?

The Aristocrats

A couple of Highlights I'm looking forward while living in a country were you can only get BLOCKBUSTER DVDs

Jason Alexander .... Himself (the only unfortunate thing in regards to DVD extras is that we get insight into the real person and not just the character. Take Jason Alexander for example: He is not the neurotic part of George on the hit show Seinfeld. Rather he is a stage actor [very good at his craft mind you] just doing his impression of Larry David. It is always a disappointment when we "discover" actors are actually ACTORS!)

Hank Azaria .... Himself - Moe Szyslak/Chief Wiggum/Apu/Comic Book Guy/Cletus/Prof. Frink - Nice Resume

Steven Banks .... Billy The Mime (as Billy The Mime) - Award for MOST ANTICIPATED

Lewis Black .... Himself - Award for MOST SPASMS RELATED TO ANGST

Drew Carey .... Himself - I've been told I looked like him... that person was never heard from again

George Carlin .... Himself - Seems Perfect for this

Andy Dick .... Himself -

Carrie Fisher .... Herself - Hopefully not wearing the metal bikini

Whoopi Goldberg .... Herself - Hopefully this is a joke

Gilbert Gottfried .... Himself - AFLAC!

Eddie Izzard .... Himself - Ever seen "Dressed to Kill"? Some of the best stand up ever. I saw him on Parkinson but he was wearing men's clothes. Never thought I would ever be weirded out by a man wearing men's clothes...

Penn Jillette .... Himself - He's a comedian? I thought he was a piece of poo...

Richard Lewis .... Himself - of CURB fame

Bill Maher .... Himself - not very politically correct

Howie Mandel .... Himself - He's alive?

Jackie Martling .... Himself (as Jackie 'The Jokeman' Martling) - Yuck

Kevin Nealon .... Himself - well this is news to me

Trey Parker .... Cartman/Stan - brilliant

Emo Philips .... Himself - I don't know him from his standup but one of my friends Matt Tobiason from Tokyo would always do his bits - The one where people are comparing their religions and one difference cause one of them to throw the other off a bridge... ["you an orthodox, scientific creationist, from the church of methodological saints' southern chapter?" "No I'm from the northern chapter" so I proceeded to throw him off the bridge.] Emo's cadence and delivery always got me. So did his performance in UHF.

Kevin Pollak .... Himself - "give me the keys you fucking cocksucker"

Paul Reiser .... Himself - Strangely reminds me of a less funny Michael Keaton. Strangely because 1) They don't look too much alike, 2) Michael Keaton would not really be considered a comedian. If you don't know by now I'm not really a fan of Mad About You

Andy Richter .... Himself - I thought Late Night With Conan O'Brien wouldn't be the same without him. Unfortunately for him I was wrong.

Don Rickles .... Himself - heard of him before... the word curmudgeon comes to mind. not much else.

Chris Rock .... Himself - One of the most brilliant comedians of the last 20 years. SNL held him back.

Bob Saget .... Himself - Ever notice how Bob Saget has tried to distance himself from the loving father he played on my favorite sitcom growing up, "Full House", By displaying his acting chops in "Half Baked" and now this? I commend him. The world is too mushy.

Harry Shearer .... Himself - Montgomery Burns/Waylon Smithers/Ned Flanders/Kent Brockman/Rev. Lovejoy/Principal Skinner/Dr. Hibbert/Rainer Wolfcastle - nice resume #2

Sarah Silverman .... Herself - Y'all know how I feel about Sarah.

Jon Stewart .... Himself - A modern day... um... someone who tells it like it is....

Matt Stone .... Kyle/Kenny - brilliant

Teller .... Himself - He better speak in this... we already have a mime. We don't need a shitty mime

Scott 'Carrot Top' Thompson .... Himself (as Carrot Top) - No Comment

Fred Willard .... Himself - subtle humor seems to be his fort-ay. Loved him in all of Christopher Guest's movies, and "How High". Interested to see him pull off the joke.

Robin Williams .... Himself - probably my least favorite comedian of all time... maybe that's because I grew up in the "Mrs. Doubtfire" era.

OMG post of the day

If I was in the states I could go see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in about 2 hours and 17 minutes!!! That would be so cool. I think I'll go down to the DVD store and see if they have it on hand.

movies I want to see

the aristocrats -
Jesus is magic

Sorry, Sarah Silverman just does it for me... and there would be no argument about changing names. That the only thing I can envision about my fantasy relationship with Sarah Silverman. Other than that it's just us standing in a room with blank looks on our faces. Seriously, I need to work on my imagination.

Question of the Day

How many time has Kevin Garnett finished 1 assist shy of a triple Double? i know he did it about 6 or 7 times in his MVP season of '03-'04, and he just did it the other day. I've looked for sites that have game logs over a career and I would have put in the time to just look at ever game he's ever played but I can't even find this... Can anybody help me...

From the Who Cares Dept.

Big News everybody. Looks like The New York Yankees exercised Tanyon Sturtze's 1.5 million dollar option for 2006. The 35-year-old right-hander was 5-3 with a 4.73 ERA and one save in one start and 63 relief appearances.

View: Looks like the New York Yankees have shored up their middle relief for next year.

didn't want this site to be totally depressing so here's a post.